I nag my children so much about eating. After Arpana returns home from school, I check her lunch box and see if it is empty. If it is not, I grill her with n
questions. Sometimes, I annoy my entire family concerning food.
But I know of a mother, whom I
will call Wari amma. She’s a widow of
60+ years, poor, with a heart condition and not many people to call family. She also
struggles with bouts of depression. Her only son is a Schizophrenic.
He is a well mannered, pleasant young man who tries to lead a normal life otherwise. However, sometimes
the psychotic symptoms become too much for him to handle. This causes him to become
withdrawn completely and refuses to go to work. Wari amma runs from pillar to
post and meets every high official in his line of work to make sure that he
gets leave sanctioned, and she then runs to every department in the hospital to ensure that he gets treated. Sometimes, the doctors of this overcrowded hospital help her, sometimes they
think that she’s lying about the symptoms. But she’s
persistent, she is always determined to get help.
She doesn’t even know to read,
but gives every medicine perfectly without missing a single dosage.
I’ve seen the medicines' names scribbled in her son’s medical record notebook, with many
revisions done in subsequent visits, it is pretty hard to decipher. But
thanks to Wari amma's skills, the medication he takes is always prescription-perfect.
Few days back, he had a relapse
of some delusions and hallucinations and he stopped going to work. She came to
our house and gave my husband her son’s phone and asked to look for some higher
official’s contact number. My husband fished out some probable numbers, she
patiently called each person and tactfully explained her son’s condition and requested
leave. Then, she put herself together to plead her son to come to the hospital.
He refused, and she continued to beg him. He scowled at her and he went away. That’s
when she got a call from work, saying that they can’t sanction leave until they
get a medical approval. And if it doesn’t happen he will lose his job.
Wari amma, was stuck. A son who refuses
to go to the hospital, and a situation where he’s going to lose his job. She
has to act, or else her son would face the consequence. She left her son in our
premises and asked us to keep an eye on him. It was a rather hot day, she scurried to the hospital despite the blazing sun, without an umbrella, and pleaded with the doctors to give a medical leave approval. The doctors refused. With a heavy heart, she
wondered what could be done. When suddenly she remembered that her son hadn’t
eaten lunch.
In a while she reached our place, she told my husband, ‘Avana konjam saapida sollu pa(please ask him to eat)’. After some team-persuasion, Wari amma’s son sat on the couch and decided to
eat lunch. I was startled at what I saw. She took something from her bag, it was a three-tier stainless steel lunch box filled with piping hot white rice, beans and potato sambhar and vazhakai poriyal. Each food was freshly cooked and sizzling hot. From
the hospital, this frail woman went home to cook her son a meal. She placed the plate before him and served the rice, when
she was about to serve sambhar, he shoved the plate away, shouted at Wari amma and sped
away in his bike. My husband rushed behind to make certain that he doesn't go too far.
For the first time in a long
time, I saw tears swell up in this strong woman and with
a broken voice, she asked me "Avan ippidiyae thaan irupaana ma? (Will he always be like this?) ”
I didn’t know what to say. I
compelled her to eat and just when she finished, her son returned. In a while,
we could persuade him and finally got him to eat. The mother sighed a little
relief. We got some other wonderful people to help and together got him admitted in the hospital.
He is getting treated and we are praying that he will get better soon. But I
can never forget that hot lunch box.
You know they say food is an
emotion. I saw so many of that in that hot lunch box. I have seen hot biryani, hot idli and the
magic that hot tea and coffee can do. But Wari amma’s hot lunch box is the
greatest, costliest and most delicious food I have ever seen. When I’m cooking for
my children I’m thinking taste and nutrition. I wonder what goes on in Wari
amma’s mind when she is cooking for her son. She is a petite ordinary woman, a woman of few words, she doesn’t even know the name of her son’s condition, but I doubt that even a
learned woman will give him the kind of moral, physical, and spiritual support
that she gives. I haven’t seen a moment when she’s tired of taking care of him.
She fights so many odds every single day
to ensure a safe future for her grown up son.
Her real complete name means ‘The
Great Ruler’. She is petite figure with a small voice. But in her heart, she is
one Great Ruler fighting Schizophrenia alone with her son and I am sure one day they
will rule over it.
